For this blog I interviewed one of my male best friend who happens to be single. He has been single approximately 1 year 2 months, but has since been on several dates. He is 27, lives on his own in his own house and in full-time employment. This was a great opportunity for me as I feel that dates or single people are spoken about but it’s always from the female perspective. Shall we find out what the men think or say? First dates? Ideal dates? What really matters when it comes to dating/ relationships? One night stands and all those interesting gossip we love about dates and dating. Our single man gives us an insight into a single mans life. Go on then grab a cuppa and give this read.
When asked to describe one of the dates he has been on, in his description, he described a recent date that he went on, “I took one girl out for drinks in town, I like to go quite up class so we went to saltwater first then had a few drinks around the lacemarket, she was very nice and we went on a few more dates after.”
Saltwater is a bar in the city Centre of Nottingham, it’s a very nice bar and quite cosy, nice cocktails too with a beautiful balcony/smoking area.
Lacemarket is an area of the city Centre of Nottingham with a number of bars and restaurant.
For a man whose been single over a year, this sounds like a lovely chilled date and has the potential to allow both parts to know each other, especially for my single man whose looking for a potential relationship, but emphasized that only if the right person came around and he is not rushing anything for the sake of it.
Regards to initiating the dates, he reckons it doesn’t matter who initiates the date as long as both parties have the common interest at heart. When asked after how many dates is he able to tell he likes the person, “I think you can get a clear understanding of whether you like the person after the first date, I think if you go on multiple dates then it’s a clear sign that there is definitely some chemistry there”.
I’m here thinking that it could be true that the first date is very important after that response.
I thought this was quite interesting, our single man has a number of things to consider before asking for a second date, he said Firstly they have to be good looking, he adds on to say that “I know that may sound vain but you have to like what you’re going to be kissing! A good sense of humour is a must and good dress sense would be preferable! Long pauses between conversations are awkward so I would be looking to avoid that!” Then I later on threw in the question which I feel a lot of females wonder a lot about, I asked my single man if he would go on a second date even if he didn’t want to but the woman asked for it and in his response he said he could be swayed, and added on to say as long as she paid for it. He cheekily added on to say that, he thinks physical attraction is the most important thing for a first date.
In a situation where a date is planned a few days in advance, I asked my single guy if he texts or calls the person before the date, “Yeah definitely, it would be quite awkward if you haven’t spoke to the person for a few days and then you met! I always try and initiate conversation daily it’s the best way leading up to a date”. Love this response, so its not just women who actually show concern a few days leading to their first date with that special person, our single guy here has actually shown that he cares about the planned date. Our single man also adds on to say that he doesn’t think there is any harm in setting up new dates even if you have one arranged, you have to keep your options open if the first one fails through.
Online dating is on the increase so I wanted to find out what our single man’s thoughts were on the whole online dating and he thinks online dating is can be hit and miss, the chance of actually meeting someone off a dating website is slim to none. The more renowned online dating websites with a higher strike rate are extortionately expensive so he wouldn’t go down this route of getting a date.
Makes me wonder what men are online for dating.
Ours single man believes that women who put in that extra effort to their first date, shows a lot of class, he loves women who make an effort and look the best they can on a first date, if a girl turn up in tracksuit bottoms he is not going to be blown away.
When asked about dating someone in the same work place, his response was quite interesting “Three words- Don’t do it. Things can get very complicated and messy and you still have to work with them”. Wow makes me wonder if he has experienced this, as he was very clear about it. He added on to say that he doesn’t like to get his family/family involved in his dating life, although he is had a few double dates with friends. I also asked our single man if would ask a stranger for a date and his response “Yes I probably would there is no harm in asking and you don’t know where things will lead to!”.
Females have always reported how things are going well with someone they are dating, but then say we cant be together because of timing, and a few of them have given different views and opinions on the whole “timing” thing so I wanted to hear it from our single man, “Probably not, if you’re not fully committed to the relationship then it isn’t fair on the other person, your hearts not going to be fully in it so the likelihood of it working is slim” I thought this was an honest answer, I think its important to remain true to yourself.
To finalise our interview I wanted to throw in some questions that are usually discussed by females. I have recently found out that females usually question the reason why men approach them in a bar/social event, so I thought I ask my single man if he is always looking for a relationship when he talks to women? “Not always, again it depends on what you are both after, I have had a couple of one night stands because that is what we both wanted.” Then I finally asked my single man if the success of a woman or how successful the family is scare him “No absolutely not, money shouldn’t be an issue, if you like the person and vice versa then money doesn’t even come into the equation.”
I really hope you enjoy reading this as I had so much fun writing this blog and I feel that men rarely talk about their life as a single man, I choose to keep the interviewee’s identity a secret, but I could honestly pass his number on to any potentials or interested.
All My Love!